


In Which Anakin Skywalker Receives A Very Odd Phone Call

by Anonymous



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: AU, F/M, Gen, Modern AU, domestic AU, look I just wanted fluff so I wrote it myself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-11
Packaged: 2019-03-03 10:50:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13339698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Luke and Leia manage to capture their mother's personal cellphone. They manage to call Anakin Skywalker. They also manage to change their lives, whether they know it or not.(A modern domestic one-shot regarding the twins discovering their father's phone number and inviting/disinviting him to their birthday party)





	In Which Anakin Skywalker Receives A Very Odd Phone Call

 

"Anakin Skywalker."

"Hello, daddy?" Luke tried to reach out for the cellphone but Leia leaned back in her chair. "I just wanted to call you to let you know you're an _asshole_."

His eyes narrowed. One of those, eh? "First of all," he began through gritted teeth, but the voice on the other line ignored him.

"Mama cries over you every night--still," Leia continued, standing up in the seat and wobbling while Luke jumped for the phone.

"Let me talk to him!"

Anakin's brow furrowed. "Who is this?"

"I wanna talk to him!"

"No!"

"Let me talk to him!"

"Get off!"

"Who. is. this?" he hissed, causing silence on the other end.

"...No one you care about, obviously," snipped the surprisingly controlled voice. "I don't care what you do in LA but I just want you to know that I will never, ever forgive you--"

"I will! I want to talk to daddy! Let me talk to daddy!"

"--and you should leave our mother alone because she doesn't need you!"

Luke had climbed up on the chair, crowding Leia's space and stance, causing her to wobble. She shrieked, holding the phone above her head.

"I want to talk," he said firmly, grabbing her arm.

"Luke, let go!"

"Who's Luke?" Anakin questioned, hand pressed to his other ear. But the call participants didn't hear, only continued their screaming. He stayed on the line for what seemed to be two pleas, one refusal, one attempt at blackmail, and five very painful pinches. "Hello?"

"GIVE ME THE PHONE!"

"LET GO!"

There was a distinctive crash followed by two thumps accompanied by twin moans.

Luke recovered first, glancing up as the phone sailed through the air and smacked against the carpet. He gasped, shooting to his feet and stumbling over to the --yep, cracked-- cellphone.

"We're dead," he whispered, crestfallen.

Leia took no heed and picked up the broken device, clicking the button that allowed speakerphone. "And you're not even invited to our birthday party, so there," she finished, as if she had never been interrupted.

"I want to talk--" Luke began.

"Shut _up_ \--"

"I want to speak to Luke," Anakin commanded, more than a little curious and determined to get to the bottom of this conversation.

The sounds of a scuffle, then a rather breathless, "You can't."

"And why not? He wants to speak to me, correct?"

"He doesn't know any better!" she spat.

Anakin opened his mouth, only to be interrupted by a rather screechy, "Stop sitting on me!"

"Give me the phone!"

"I'm going to tell mama you sat on my ribs!"

"Leia, gIVE ME THE PHONE!"

"Give him the phone," Anakin instructed, suddenly more than a little weary of this conversation.

"You can't tell me what--" she shouted, interrupted by a winded (and yet sweet) voice exclaiming, "Hi!"

"Hi."

"I won't mind if you come to our birthday party," Luke chirped, pressing down harder against his sister to quell her wriggling. "It's June 2nd, and we're turning eight!"

"He can't come!"

"He can if I say he can! I get just as much say as you!"

"He won't come," Leia informed him smugly. "He never has."

"He's never been invited before," Luke retorted. He quickly turned his attention back to the phone conversation. "So what do you say, daddy? Can you come to our birthday party?"

Silence.

Luke and Leia froze, meeting each other's gaze.

"Just who is this?" came the voice from the cellphone.

Luke slid off his sister, hitting the ground with a _thump_.

Leia sat up, face a mixture of triumph and pity. "I _told_ you," she whispered, curling in closer to him. She wrapped her arms around him.

Her brother swallowed. "We're Luke and Leia," Luke told him miserably. "The stupidest superhero twins in the galaxy."

Anakin heard the whispers before he could formulate a response.

"You're not stupid, Luke."

"Yeah, I am. And now mama is going be sad about her phone AND daddy."

"It's just her screen. The 'Padmé' is still customized."

Anakin felt his heart drop to his feet.

What.

What the _fu--_

"Padmé Naberrie? Are you calling about Padmé Naberrie?"

"None of your business," Leia shouted over Luke's shoulder into the cellphone. "Leave us alone!"

"You called me!"

"And now we're hanging up!"

" _Do not--do not hang up_ ," Anakin growled, voice tinged with steel.

The twins jolted, side-eyeing each other and then the cellphone uncomfortably.

Anakin reigned his temper in before it got to be too much, and settled into a more relaxed tone.

"Am I correct in assuming Padmé Naberrie is your mother?"

Leia wrinkled her nose while Luke muttered, "Yeah."

"And you are how old?"

"Seven," Luke sighed wearily.

A pause. "I see."

Leia stuck her tongue out.

"When can I speak to your mother?"

Luke opened his mouth but Leia leaned over him to shout, "Never, you snot-nosed peabrain! Now get out of mama's life and _stay out_!"

"Wait--!"

_Click._

Leia collapsed against the carpet, accidentally kicking Luke's shin. "Well," she groused brightly (and only Leia could grouse brightly), "that's taken care of."

The cellphone rang suddenly.

Leia shot up, catching Luke's shin once again. Luke winced and scooted over. The two of them stared down at the cellphone dismally.

"Same number," Luke reported blankly.

Leia made a disgusted noise.

"What can we do?"

"How should I know?"

"It was your idea," he reminded her.

"It was an agreed-upon idea," she amended.

The phone kept ringing.

"We could..." Luke hedged, glancing around conspicuously. "...Bury it in the backyard?"

His suggestion was weak, but Leia clucked her tongue anyways. After a moment, she nodded.

"I'll go grab the shovels."

 

* * *

 

And so Anakin Skywalker called Padmé Naberrie's-- _Padmé Skywalker's_ \--woefully demolished cellphone fifty-nine times, not aware that it currently was buried between the sandbox and swing set.

**Author's Note:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯ 
> 
> I'm thinking Anakin and Padmé were married but "Dark Side~" (aka something totally believable in the real world) and now Anakin is a bit of a cynical douche not knowing he has kids and Padme is a senator/politician law person who is also a suburban mom because she rules. 
> 
> Will I continue this?
> 
> Maybe.


End file.
